US, December 24, 2011 (caring.com): “A few hours before she died, my mother said, ‘Are you the gentleman who’s come to meet me?’ She was not addressing anyone in the room.” — Michele, a North Carolina mother of four
These “deathbed visions,” as British neuropsychiatrist Peter Fenwick, a specialist in near-death experiences, calls them, almost always take place when the person is clearly conscious — even though witnesses sometimes mistake the visions and speech for signs of delirium. Some dying people switch easily between conversations with those at the bedside and with someone unseen. The people and places are usually connected with feelings of peace and security. In the U.S. and the U.K., nearly three-fourths of visions are of friends and relatives who aren’t living, says Fenwick, author of The Art of Dying. About 13 percent of people seen are religious figures, compared to 50 percent of people in India who see Hindu figures. Seeing strangers is relatively rare.
“On the day she died, my mom kept talking about traveling, like, ‘Let’s go, what are we waiting for . . . oh, there’s a plane ahead of us . . . no, that’s not the right plane.’ She also told my dad that he should take a later flight. She was definitely going someplace,” says Patricia Anderson, 45-year-old Ohio insurance account executive.
The person may also allude to “making ready” (packing, making checklists, issuing directions). Some observers think that this talk of journey-making is a subconscious way dying people let family members know they know they’re passing away.
“The hospice people had told me that sometimes people won’t die when their loved ones are in the room, especially if the person has played a protective role in their lives,” shared to Lise Funderburg, a Philadelphia writer.