AUGUST 28, 2008: The fascinating book, “Danes Are Like That!,” is available for free at the URL above. This 106 page study is by an Indian anthropologist, G. Prakash Reddy, who spent time living with the people of Hvilsager village in Denmark. His objective was to study the Danes therein just as Western anthropologists studied the villagers of India and make suitable pronouncements upon their life. The extremely readable and frequently humorous table-turning report was an instant hit among Danes themselves. Here are a couple of excerpts. For the full text, go to the URL above. Other interesting books are available for free download at the same site, including “Indian Science and Technology in the Eighteenth Century.”
“During the day the child is doted upon by its parents and visiting grandparents, sisters, brothers and aunts, it is hugged and kissed. But by nightfall, this doting is abruptly comes to an end when the child is fed and put to bed in a separate room and the door closed. Now it is time for the Danish husband and wife to enjoy privacy and television. If the child weeps, the parents rarely open the door and comfort it. Many parents say that the child learns very quickly that it gains nothing by weeping. Perhaps this daily attachment and detachment process makes it easy for both the parents and the children when the time for the final departure of the latter comes at eighteen.
“If both parents work, a common occurrence in present day Danish society, they find little time to attend to the emotional needs of the child. When the child returns from school or from play there will be no one at home to receive it to give it a bath or food. The child is left to fend for itself. Parents, however, do not do this willfully; but they have no way of attending to these tasks, they have no time.
“Before a youngster settles down with a partner, he usually passes through a number of dates. After deciding to live together by setting up a household it is very rare for the boy and girl to go through a formal marriage immediately, either in church or at the municipality. Usually a young couple opt for formal marriage after the birth of one or two children. The boy and girl living together without formal marriage do not call themselves “husband” and “wife” despite societal acceptance of such unions which are in fact very common today. Instead, talking to a third person, they refer to themselves as “boy friend” and “girl friend”. If any one asks such a youth: “Are you married?” invariably the answer if it is a boy is: “No, I am living with my girl friend”, and if it is a girl: “No, I live with my boy friend”. This state of calling themselves boy friend and girl friend in many cases continues even after the birth of children. However, after a few years of living together, and as their children grow up, they call themselves husband and wife. It seems that for the young couple living together without a formal marriage ceremony, a period of incubation is required before they call themselves husband and wife. But young married couples present themselves as husband and wife, even if they have no children.”