Sri Pramukh Swami Haharajwhen asked, "Where is your home?" (1869-1948)

A disciple approached his guru and said, "Guruji, my six brothers are all asleep, and I alone have remained awake to worship God." His guru responded, "You, too, had better be asleep if your worship of God consists of accusations against your brothers."

Trouble itself they send away troubled who do not trouble themselves at the sight of it. Tirukural, Verse 623

"I look my age. It is everyone else who looks older than they are. But what can you expect from people who eat corpses." George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950) when asked at age 84 how he maintained such a youthful appearance. He was a vegetarian.

A certain Tamil man attended the coronation of Queen Elizabeth in the UK. He wore kurta, veshti, sash, vibhuti, kumkuma and all the acouterments of a fine Saivite devotee. At the dinner party those around him made silent fun of him as he ate with his fingers. When finished, he threw his plate outside. Addressing the aghast crowd he said, "Where I came from we only eat once from a plate." Not realizing he was speaking of the practice of using a banana leaf for a plate, whispers passed among the astonished guests–"Ah, he must be a very rich man."

"Do not criticize unless you know how to remedy the error you criticize." Nolini Kanta Gupta, disciple of Sri Aurobindo

LHASA, TIBET: Employing the brash style that first brought him to prominence, Sri Dhananjai Bikram won the fifth annual International Yogi Competition yesterday with a world-record point total of 873.6. "I am the serenest!" Bikram shouted to the estimated crowd of 20,000 yoga fans, vigorously pumping his fists. "No one is serener than Dhananjai Bikram–I am the greatest monk of all time!" Bikram averaged 1.89 breaths a minute during the two-hour competition, nearly .3 fewer than his nearest competitor, second-place finisher and two-time champion Sri Salil "The Hammer" Gupta. The heavily favored Gupta was upset after the loss. "I should be able to beat that guy with one lung tied," Gupta said. "I'm beside myself right now, and I don't mean trans-bodily." Bikram enjoyed a fast start at the Lhasa meet, which like most major competitions, is a six-event affair. In the first event, he attained total consciousness (TC) in just 2 minutes, 34 seconds, and set the tone for the rest of the meet by repeatedly shouting, "I'm blissful! You blissful? I'm blissful!" to the other yogis. From a purely fictional report circulating on the Internet